So this is supposed to be my first post and I'm thinking about it way too hard. I'm stumped as to what to write! I'm trying to be clever and witty, well-written and intelligent. I need to just let it flow - the reason I started this blog was just to have a venue to lay out my thoughts, compose my ideas, maybe understand more about myself. A diary, where I can be honest, raw and uncensored (hence the adult warning.)
A quick summary of my life at this point: I'm 33, living in the suburbs of New York City with my husband of 10 years and my three children. I've had an interesting but not overly dynamic career in marketing and publishing. After the birth of my first child, I stayed home for about four years, in which time I had a second child. I went back into marketing/publishing in 2004 and stayed there until 2007 and I'm back home again with my third child. I'm not sure where I'm going next. I've started a small company to manage while I'm home with the kids and while I would love for it to grow into something major, in reality, I don't believe that that will happen. Pessimist? Maybe; or maybe just a realist.
Most days, I'm consumed with taking care of my kids, doing stuff around the house like cooking and cleaning. I love when my house looks clean and organized but I hate doing it, partly because we have so much "stuff" and not enough room in our house for it all. So it gets frustrating trying to find a home for everything and then I sometimes rather not deal with it at all. Other times, like this past weekend, I get a boost of energy and having a good cleaning session. My daughter's room was the lucky recipient of that boost.
I've struggle with my weight for most of my life. I had such terrible self esteem in high school and now I look at those pictures and die to look like that again. I was gorgeous! I think I still have it in me, I just haven't been able to commit to bringing it out. I don't have the will and the energy to stick with diet and exercise. Diet and exercise is hard and boring, booooooooooo. But I hate living my life like this so something is going to have to give.
Right now, my daughter is home from school early with a fever. I'm off to attend to her.
